10 Best Teams In Football: PT. I

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ODYSSEY'S
TOP 10 TEAMS 
   
        Just before the much-maligned international break interrupts the European football season, we saw a pivotal weekend play out all across Europe as multiple giants collided, some falling, some rising and others simply looking like Robert Downey Jr in 1998.
          Bayern Munich defaced Dortmund in the Bundesliga, Juventus escaped v AC Milan thanks to a morale-boosting winner from De Ligt, Marseille beat Lyon in Ligue 1 play thanks to the reincarnation of Dimitri Payet and Manchester City traveled to Liverpool for a harsh defeat, the unblemished Merseysiders frustrating City with two early goals and never looking back.

            It wasn't a weekend that'll decide the EPL or Bundesliga title race, as much as Liverpool fans hope and feel that it should (9 points between City and EPL leaders Liverpool); instead, this weekend is all about stamping a foot down, drawing a line in the sand and psychologically withstanding the pain of the grind. 
           At this stage, there's still plenty of time for injuries, defeats, loss of form and managerial changes to take effect or disrupt a team's flow...although clubs lacking an athletic, aggressive bite are finding themselves on the outside looking in:
          We are on the cusp of a revolution in football, an occurrence that happens once every ten to fifteen years where the overall footballing dynamic shifts and the torches are either passed or pried away.

          Just as it shifted in the aftermath of the 2006 World Cup when the late 90s to mid-2000s era of galactico superstars ended thanks to the Spanish national team and Guardiola's Barcelona rewriting the script on how to win a football match by deploying smaller, more technical players and instituting a passing dominance on their way to title winning glory. 
          And just as the FIFA rules changed in 1990 to forego the goalkeeper back-pass (enabling a far more offensive and open sport), we are in those deep waters of change again...right now:

           The technicians are still running the show, no doubt, but in the last few years we've seen up-tempo, aggressive managerial tactics and combative pressing from their uber-athletic, highly versatile players winning out over pure possession and absolute artistry (see: Liverpool vs Barcelona and Manchester City the last few seasons, the rise of RB Leipzig from the basement of German football to the pinnacle of the Bundesliga and Champions League qualification using off the ball tactics, the blistering, organized aggression of Ajax's young stars when they destroyed Real Madrid at the Bernabeu, or the adaptable, chameleonic way France won the 2018 World Cup and the way in which the Netherlands returned to relevancy)....this all points to a growing trend in football.
           This "aggressive pragmatism" from managers such as Julian Nagelsmann, Jurgen Klopp and Antonio Conte (see: Spain v Italy Euro 2016) has reigned supreme over the pass-happy domination of Manchester City, Dortmund, Bayern Munich and (the worst culprit of all) Barcelona...but what does this all mean????
           Does it mean possession-oriented teams have died?
           No...far from it, in fact, Liverpool aim to dominate the ball just as much as they look to deny it to their opponent, much the same with most of these "aggressively pragmatic" teams.
           Overall, this is a sign of the game becoming faster, more competitive and exceedingly violent in its frenetic pace. Football is moving on from the days of beer-guzzling badasses like Paul Gascoigne or Roy Keane being able to last 90 minutes against the thoroughbreads of today 
(that is...unless you're James Milner). 
          With an impending international break, this last primal weekend in the sports world gave us a beautiful widescreen look into the soul of every club. 
          Here's what we saw:
          What did you see?

10. PSG

            PSG began 19/20 in dire circumstances: Thomas Tuchel's side were hit with an injury plague that saw Cavani, Diallo, Neymar and Kylian Mbappe all knocked out of a crucial Champions League tie vs Real Madrid....and everyone saw the impending doom written (in PSG's blood) on the wall.
           But in a commanding and extremely underrated coaching display, Tuchel brought the piecemeal attack together for a 3-0 victory over Real Madrid, gaining control over the group before Mbappe, Neymar or Cavani had touched the ball.
           That result was huge for the Parisians as the Madrid matches are the only real tests they'll receive until after Xmas...doubt they're bothered by that.
          While posting a perfect record in the Champions League group stage (10 goals scored, 0 allowed), they've however been far from convincing in domestic play. They've already lost three matches due to woefully inferior, unprofessional displays against "weaker" competition.
            Now that Mbappe has returned (7 goals and 3 assists in 6 apps. since his return) PSG look back to their usual goal-amassing competitively insecure selves, though we'd love to see more high quality creativity from newb Pablo Sarabia and veteran midfielder (but still barely plays like it) Marco Verratti.

            As for Neymar?
            If I'm Tuchel I don't count on him to perform at his highest levels in the toughest games, I don't consider him an automatic starter and I'd force him to the psychological brink, hoping this savage treatment for the first time in his career would ignite the Brazilian to go on and play his best season yet. 
              If it doesn't work, then oh well, PSG weren't counting on him anyway.
             There are still concerns over the fitness of Neymar, Mbappe and a host of other Paris Saint Germain stalwarts with  the creeping possibility of their stranglehold on Ligue 1 finally coming to an end. There's also the deciding encounter of their Champions League quest (thus far) by way of an awkward trip to the Bernabeu...
              Until then, we have no clue what team PSG are.
               
TEAM MVP: ANGEL DI MARIA 
(7 assists, 8 goals, 1 UDGC, 3 key passes off post, 48 chances created)

9. AJAX 


             That double red card sequence at Stamford Bridge in the space of twenty odd seconds was as harsh as it was justified, but the two Chelsea matches have brought Ajax from group destroyers to stalemate merchants.
              Ajax dug deep, got lucky and let Onana make a few stunning saves and held out for the wild 4-4 draw, all while playing the final 25+ minutes down two men (and losing another man when Erik Ten Hag was forced to sacrifice Hakim Ziyech to bring on another defender).
               Due to the madness of that night at Stamford Bridge, Valencia, Chelsea and last year's semifinalists are all locked in a three-way tie on 7 points, an almost impossible scenario after the first few matchdays where Chelsea lost at home to Valencia and Ajax cruised to consecutive 3-0 formalities.
               Despite the temporary setbacks against Lampard's men, Ajax have expanded their powers as a unit in 19/20. Ten Hag has gone with Edson Alvarez and Lisandro Martinez's youth and athleticism in midfield and Ajax debutant / Dutch winger Quincy Promes' Sterling-esque runs going forward to befuddle and disturb opposition.
            With the signing and constant appearances of Promes' thrust and finishing in the final third, Ten Hag has upped the stakes in attack in his quest to "replace" Frenkie De Jong and De Ligt's contributions in midfield and defense.
          In fact, this team without De Jong and De Ligt have scored 63 goals, 5 more than their 58 by the international break at this stage in 18/19.
          With the new hulking midfielder Edson Alvarez playing beautifully, both Ziyech and Tadic with 10+ assists on the season already and Neres, Promes and Huuntelaar banging in the goals, could Ajax blow everyone off the pitch, manage the red card suspensions in their defense and get out of this group as rightful winners?
               
TEAM MVP: HAKIM ZIYECH 
(14 assists (#1), 7 goals. 64 chances (#1) & 6 UDGC (#1)

8. BARCELONA 


             I wrestled with this...I didn't believe the Catalan "giants" deserved a place on this list...the performances have been a shambles, an absolute travesty committed upon all football fans, but specifically what Valverde has been allowed to do to Barcelona is a terrifying reminder of the power of being the "yes" buddy of a rich guy.
            From the plague of injuries that marred the beginning of the 19/20 campaign and culminated in the impotent 1-0 home loss to lowly "rivals" Espanyol on opening day, or the re-positioning of Griezmann as a winger, or the disgraceful exile of Ousmane Dembele, Carles Alena, Malcolm, Semedo, Junior Firpo (etc) from selection, the fact Pique only gets 4-5 hours of sleep a night, the insanity and vulgarity of Valverde's dangerous XIs (involving rushing injured players back and playing Rakitic until he turns into a pillar of salt), Barcelona haven't just been bad, they aren't just boring: they're embarrassing.

            Once the team gave the biggest players complete control, once they gave the captaincy to a mute, the minute they started thinking "without Messi we are no more" and the instant they threw away their team-first ethos, Barcelona were never going to go anywhere under such a selfish and money-hungry board willing to sell the soul of the club and the final chunk of Messi's, Pique's and Busquets' careers for....for what???
             Some marketing deals?
             Some friendly matches in America for tons of corporate cash?
             There's always been shady dealings and characters in our favorite sport, hell it may be the reason you dear reader love the sport! But when it becomes a festering virus that spreads and contaminates Barca players on the pitch, we all notice: 
              The tempo becomes slower than L.A traffic, more ponderous than every Tarantino film combined and the passing is as mind-numbing as a hangover breakfast with Pat Sajack. 
               We all see it, we all know what's taking place before our bleary, half-closed eyes and more than anything, it's depressing to see Lionel Messi forced to drag a disinterested and bloated Barcelona corpse over the finish line, like he did vs Celta Vigo with 3 goals from set pieces.
               They've been abysmal in defense, specifically, keeping 4 clean sheets on the campaign (Valverde's gutless charges had to refrain from attacking vs Dortmund and Prague just to maintain the 0-0 scorelines) and if it weren't for Marc-Andre Ter Stegen, Barcelona would be out of the Champions League group stage and (just to illustrate exactly how shitty Barca have been under the claustrophobic madness of Ernesto Valverde) this team would be miles behind the still-struggling Madrid clubs in La Liga, too.

TEAM MVP: MARC-ANDRE TER STEGEN
(36 saves, 1 assist, 15 clearances)
(for comparison purposes)               
MANUEL NEUER 
(41 saves, 8 clearances, 0 assists)


7. REAL MADRID 


         Zinedine Zidane never imagined his return would start like this: James Rodriguez and Gareth Bale still in the Madrid squad somehow (with Bale proving himself to be more than a luxury bench asset or a washed up lackie), the new signings Eden Hazard, Luka Jovic and seemingly unstoppable fullback Ferland Mendy are all struggling for fitness or form and in the end, what you have is Real Madrid mirroring Barcelona's identity crisis: Zidane's "team" are more or less a collection of talent than a working unit.
          At least Real Madrid have stayed true to their values throughout: buying indiscriminately, passing the ball around the back and in deep midfield as if they were waiting for a bus, massaging huge egos (Kroos, Marcelo, Modric, Casmeiro) and still they look better than Valverde's Barcelona, all while playing like a fart in an elevator.
           It wasn't more than two weeks ago that we were discussing Real Madrid's impending KO from the Champions League, many expecting Ramos, Benzema, Hazard and co to to crash and burn against Galatasaray. But after surviving the back to back series vs the Turkish giants, they're looking like a sure-fire second place team in the group.
           However, if they are to knock off PSG at home and then get help from Galatasaray in beating PSG at the Parc De Princes on the final match day, Real Madrid could pull off an impossible feat and come out group winners.
            But if they eventually come out of the group in second, who'd want to play them in the Round of 16?

TEAM MVP: KARIM BENZEMA 
          (11 goals, 5 assists & has hit the post 4x)

6. BAYERN MUNICH 


           While Bayern's defenders, goalkeeper and sporting directors worry about who gets to start for Germany's Euro 2020 qualifiers, they've allowed a startling 29 goals to opponents already by mid-November, and it's a damning lack of focus at the back that has started to define them, no matter what the scoreline.
           In comparison, Bayern only conceded 15 goals at this juncture last season...
           As a team they've put everyone on notice: their defense has more holes than the plot of a John Woo film. 
          Their defense has been so soft, so slow and far too easy to exploit in the last few seasons, Manuel Neuer be damned. 
            At the back, they've given away 5 penalties (including 2 in the same match vs Union Berlin) and conceded 8 goals that affected results in the early or later minutes of matches.
And it hasn't seemed to matter how much talent they've had in midfield or how bountiful they've been in attack, leaking goals has ruined Bayern's Champions League odyssey in the Lewandowski / Kimmich era...(the horrors in defense even cursed the Ribery / Robben era, too).
           But after firing Niko Kovac (a hatchet job that must've felt like an orgasm for the Croatian after a year on the hot seat), they've returned to form with two victories, two clean sheets, a 4-0 evisceration of Borussia Dortmund and Thomas Muller looking less like a Bond villain and more like the penalty box predator who ran the show at two consecutive World Cups.
           Yet at this juncture, Borussia Monchengladbach hold a 4 point lead in one of the most open Bundesliga races in years, while Leipzig, Bayern and Freiburg are all tied on points and Dortmund, Schalke and Hoffenheim trail just behind...though we feel Leipzig, Bayern and Dortmund will be the three battling until May.
            Still, not everything is dire for the manager-less Bavarians (after all, Bayern hold a 5 point grip on their UCL group): they lack an identity and a footballing culture due to a lot of moving parts: Joshua Kimmich returns to midfield and has been stunning, yet his deliveries and overall production from out wide is a dangerous component that's been sorely missed in the German masters' attacking stew; Lucas Hernandez has been far from convincing in a slew of roles and is now out injured, while fellow Frenchman Benjamin Pavard has focused more on scoring goals than defending; in midfield, Thiago and Tolisso overcome long-term injury woes to start and provide Kimmich a bass line to groove around.
          Up top, winger / forward Serge Gnabry may go missing on occasion yet still continues to progress as a dynamic young talent, his partner in attack (the True king of Assassin's Feed) Robert Lewandowski resumes his goalscoring compulsion with 24 goals in 18 appearances and newbs Coutinho and Perisic are finding their footing gradually (with moments of magic as a tantalizing preview)....in conclusion??
            ...this team is such a mixed bag.

           On one hand they look like, play like and feel as if they could blow most top clubs out of the water with their athletic and technical midfield, big time experience down the spine of the team (Neuer, Muller, Thiago Alcantara, Lewandowski) and their plethora of legitimate world class attackers.
            Yet from one game to the next Bayern have been more than inconsistent...more than wild or erratic, they've simultaneously looked like two (maybe even three) very different clubs:
           At one point (not long ago) this side threw in the towel in an unprofessional 5-1 debacle to Frankfurt in hopes their disgraceful collective performance would force (the Caligula of football) Mr. Uli Hoeness to dismiss Kovac; shortly after these horrid events, Lewandowski, Kimmich and co can be seen clinically dispensing vicious wrath upon Dortmund 4-0; or, as we've seen when they choked on a 2-1 home defeat to Hoffenheim, Munchen are completely capable of losing their edge altogether (this was a match where they attempted 20 shots, created 14 chances and had 64% of the ball) and finally, they completed the biggest rout in European football this year after throttling last year's Champions League finalists 7-2 in London.
            The club's performances are bizarre, but are they beginning to settle? 
            We won't know what Bayern we'll see match to match until they find their new manager...Arsene Wenger?              Nope.
            BREAKING NEWS: BAYERN MUNICH HIRE....
BORIS BECKER!
       

TEAM MVP: ROBERT LEWANDOWSKI
          (24 goals in 18 appearances)

PT. II, #s 5-1 COMING SOON TO A BRAIN INSIDE YOU

by

LONN PHILLIPS SULLIVAN