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Showing posts from February, 2019

STATE OF PLAY: HOW SARRI CAN FIX CHELSEA

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In futbol, we saw a penalty shootout mutiny for Sarri and Chelsea, a potential appetizer  to City's quest for the quadruple, Jadon Sancho continue his rise as one of the best players in the world  (and he's only 18), the GOAT scoring his 50th hat trick in his career and Liverpool's goalless run resumes.        But what went down with Chelsea goalkeeper Kepa Arrizabalaga refusing to be substituted, blatantly shaking his head and wagging his finger in his manager's direction, with the score 0-0 and penalties only moments away, was something we'll never forget.      Chelsea manager Maurizio Sarri wanted backup keeper Willy Caballero (last seen ruining Lionel Messi's World Cup) to come on for Kepa, as the young Spanish keeper was not only slightly hurt, but Caballero is a penalty shootout specialist, saving 3 penalties earlier in the season in the competition.       But Kepa said "no," and instead of Sarri literally dragging t...

ASSISTKINGS QUARTERLY: 10 BEST CREATORS IN FUTBOL

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       Welcome back dear readers, to ASSISTKINGS QUARTERLY REDUX.         We haven't seen much movement as far as numbers of assists being racked up by certain players, so it forces us to engage in our favorite past time: digging deep into the performances, the matches, the stats, everything...            We are emphasizing recency in the total assists category as assists begin to be harder to come by in the business end of the season, although total chance creation, goals created, as well as the Legacy Metric aka their performance over the entire season and their appearances on our lists factor in as well.          Although we don't play favorites here, we just want the best.          Tell us what you think below and who your top 10 ASSISTKINGS are.          I WANNA KNOW! Key: UDGC = Uncredited direct goal contributions ak...

"SEX", DRUGS & ROCK AND ROLL??? WITH ROBERT KRAFT: 2019 AMERICA AND THE RISE OF THE FACE-EATERS

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        M oney buys power.            Power buys handshakes....a nd now, as we see with guys like Robert Kraft, power buys sleaze and handjobs.         And now, with these charges and Bob's age, Deflategate may have an entirely new meaning.          Patriots owner Robert Kraft wasn't arrested when the sting the Jupiter, Florida Police Department conducted on the Oriental Orchid (or whatever the sex parlor in the guise of a "spa" is called) was ended and the doors were busted down, but he was charged with "solicitation of another person for prostitution" according to the Jupiter, Florida Sheriff.               If you're rich you don't even get arrested, you get that part.. ya know, the one that kills most minorities..if you're white and rich, you get that  in the mail   after.             The best part: we don'...

CHAMPIONS LEAGUE BEST XI (FROM THE FIRST LEG): A SHADY AFTERMATH

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GK Anthony Lopes   (LYON) -5 saves, clean sheet kept against Barca       With 5 saves and countless danger parried away to safety, Lyon keeper Anthony Lopes barely beats out Marc-Andre Ter Stegen.        While Ter Stegen made a few highlight reel saves, he wasn't troubled much after the initial 25 minutes, whereas Lopes was busy until the final seconds, his goal peppered with countless shots, some wasted attempts by Barcelona that let Lyon off the hook, but on at least 10-12 occasions, Lopes delivered for Lyon, improbably keeping a clean sheet and saving attempts from Dembele and Messi.         Throughout the match, Lopes was commanding and dominant, sending the psychological message that Lyon wouldn't be breached.         If you're a young, mostly unknown goalkeeper and you keep a clean sheet mano a mano against Lionel Messi, Ousmane Dembele, Luis Suarez and the shell of a human inhabiting P...

CHAMPIONS LEAGUE ROUND OF 16: CITY V SCHALKE PREVIEW AND PREDICTION

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      So.....         The Round of 16 in the Champions league is finally set and we have our matchups. We're getting bang for our buck. These contests are brimming with exciting potential with youth facing off against steely experience and veteran leadership, old foes and friends facing off, an insanely titanic tie that will knock one sure-fire contender out of the competition..... what we've got is a very balanced and evenly matched Round of 16. TELL US WHO YOU THINK WILL WIN BELOW!!! SCHALKE  V  MAN CITY                  This tie seems simple on its face: City's class destroys Schalke's disorganization and toothless attack, but if you remember Manchester City's Champions League knockout round endeavors in recent memory and their propensity to fall prey to "lesser" teams, this tie becomes a little interesting.          The German side Schalke are an odd squad, ...

BARCA V LYON: CHAMPIONS LEAGUE MADNESS

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      Barcelona come into this match with high expectations, Messi nursing a bad calf, Suarez being in and out of form and manager Ernesto Valverde's decision making showing a lack of long term thought. They've also been playing poorly, scoring 1 goal in their last two matches and surrendering 2 goal leads in 3 of their last 6 matches.          Although Messi and co eventually would turn the deficits around and come from behind in all 3 of those matches (Levante, Sevilla and Valencia), the pressure on Messi's shoulders to do it all has hit a fever pitch.          Luis Suarez can still light it up....every other match (Valverde's lack of rotation for Suarez has cost us) though like much of the veteran core of this Barcelona side (Messi , Pique, Alba, Busquets) he has looked tired.          Yes... I know that may sound crazy when you look at the stats and fantastic performances we've seen...